Some people are afraid to speak up and challenge the boss. Some people don’t want to put forth the effort. And some just don’t care anymore.
As a result, the leader never hears the truth about himself and his ideas. The people either become silent bystanders or self-serving sycophants.
When a leader asks for feedback and does not get it, who’s fault is it?
No Feedback is Bad Feedback
I had a leader that consistently asked for feedback, but that person’s reaction to the feedback eventually shut everyone down. The leader thought just asking for feedback was enough to get people talking. It wasn’t.
How we react to the feedback of others goes a long way in determining whether they will ever provide us with candid and honest feedback again. There are usually three reasons the leader never receives the real feedback he needs.
The Leader Argues
The truth may set you free, but first it will make you angry.
Our pride often gets in the way of truly listening to the concerns of others. If someone on my team has the courage to speak up, I need to set aside my pride and listen, even if what they say stings.
Too many leaders shut down people by immediately defending themselves or their ideas. When a leader does that, the people will learn to stay quiet.
As leaders, we must set aside our pride and look for the truth inside the feedback we are getting. The truth might make us angry because it was not delivered well or it hurts us personally, but there is still truth in the message.
The Leader is Distracted
The leader said, “I’m listening.” but you could hear the leader typing on the keyboard while you were speaking. Because of that reaction, many people stopped bringing our leader their real concerns.
People are not something that should be multi-tasked. They are the only reason a leader is a leader. When someone is made to feel unimportant, they will stop challenging the status quo.
We must make our people our first priority. If someone has the courage to speak up, I need to demonstate the Selflessness to stop whatever I am doing and be sure they feel heard.
The Leader Does Nothing
If nothing ever changes, why should people continue to provide me with honest feedback? One of the most frustrating things I see in the corporate world is the consistent flow of surveys to the employees that have little or no impact.
Over time, people stop taking the requests for feedback seriously. They decide swimming against the current isn’t worth the effort. Therefore, the leadership only hears what it wants to hear. The leadership thinks everyone is happy, but the private conversations of the people tell a different story.
If I ask for feedback, I need to be willing to implement changes as a result of the feedback. It is my Duty as a leader to truly consider the ideas of others and try to make things better. Most people do not expect everything they say to spark change. But if change never happens, candor will die.
The Bottom Line:
Let’s face it. As a leader, everything that goes on within my team (or my family) is my responsibility. If my people aren’t speaking up, or if all I hear are accolades, it is usually my fault. If I hear crickets chirping, or everyone nods in agreement whenever I speak, I am to blame.
Without two way communication between the leader and the led, the leader will stagnate and the team will stagnate.
I will never get better, my team will never get better, my family will never get better unless people feel they are able to speak up, their feedback is important, and they have the chance of changing something.
A leader creates this type of environment by demonstrating the Humility to not argue, the Selflessness to focus on the person delivering the message, and the sense of Duty to actually make some changes.
Humility, Selflessness and Duty are habits. To read more about Habits of Character, watch for my new book Becoming a Leader of Character available later in 2016.
Question:
What other ways do leaders shut down communication?
